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profile Walking by faith is something easy to say, but hard to do especially when things don't go as planned. But we try all the same, and I'm no exception. This blog is in some ways cathartic, in others a means for me to pen my thoughts and struggles as I walk this life and learn to trust God more with each passing day. tag archives May 2004 June 2004 July 2004 August 2004 September 2004 October 2004 November 2004 December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 friends and credits skin by: Jane |
Monday, January 29, 2007 @ 12:05 AM
I Am @ Youth.sg A long, long time ago, in a sunny island called Singapore, there lived three young children. BEFORE  Ahem. These three young children are now three bubbly youths. AFTER  HOW SHOCKING!!!!!! LOOK AT HOW SHUAI AND PRETTY THEY ARE NOW!!!  The change is so shocking that the three of us went a bit, well, haywire.  But we recovered after about an hour. Phew. Want to know why we underwent such a major, positive change in our youth? ;) Because we are at youth.sg. I am at youth.sg. Are YOU at youth.sg? (this is so advertistment-like but for that phone, I really don't mind! see this.) Thursday, January 25, 2007 @ 11:10 PM
when i grow up, i want to... Yes, the age old question. What do you want to be when you grow up? When I was in kindergarten, I wanted to be a teacher. Then in primary school, I wanted to be an author like Enid Blyton - and moreover I didn't like the fact that so many friends around me wanted to be teachers too. In secondary school I wanted to be a paedatrician because I loved (and I still do!) kids. Then I wanted to be a journalist because I liked writing. For sometime I dabbled with the idea of a news anchor, but dismissed it when I realised you had to wake up at ungodly hours (at the time my bedtime never got past 11 hehe). Watching project superstar had me dreaming of becoming, er, well, a superstar, but nahh. Now? A huge part of me wants to answer the question with full confidence, brimming with hope and anticipation because I've found my true calling. But the reality is, I can't. I'm interested in Law, but at this moment I'm not sure if the interest is enough for me to go all the way. Judging from my ever-changing career choices from the age of 5, I need to seriously, seriously think about this. Somehow when you get older the idea of a 'good job' changes. The stark reality of the working world begins to hit you, and all of a sudden you aren't that sure if that dream job, well, deserves to be a dream job. It isn't enough if what you do for a living fuels your passion. At least, that's what I've come to realise thus far. There's a family to think about, and other things I want to fulfill as I work. I think about this question almost every day. Perhaps the blank doesn't have to be a standard, clear-cut profession you can easily find in the pages of Recruit. My answer now? When I grow up, I want to be someone who will shine for God, and impact the people around me like how He did. Let's just hope I'll find the standard, clear-cut profession that equals the above lengthy answer, very soon. * * * Royston, Mavis and Rhoda came over today (it's a long story why) and we had a nice domestic time cooking plain porridge, luncheon meat, kailan, corned beef and omelette. Haha I wish we had pictures! And we brought my popo down for some fresh air today, and she was absolutely delighted. So was I! Thank you all loads for coming. =) There are so many things to look forward to now; I only hope I don't take some things for granted. Friday, January 19, 2007 @ 11:39 PM
maybe not. Having talked about the plausible love triangle that might exist in the family, I can't help but feel a tinge of guilt. What if all there is in Ah Bo Jong's heart is merely a brother-in-law-ly affection? If ever such affection exists, of course... I'd have to admit, there is that possibility. Maybe Dad did something heroic before I was born - so heroic, she cannot bear to thrust upon him the agony of listening to her own complaints and her sometimes-distasteful habits. I'd like to do something heroic, if that's the case. But I can't help but pity her sometimes. Alright maybe occassionally. She lives alone in the same neighbourhood, and she's single. Think about it: Years ago, you were drop dead gorgeous and held all the attention of the world. All of a sudden you grow old and you lose all the appeal, and noone really bothers about you anymore. Would we become different people if others treated us differently? Perhaps she did. So she drops by more often these days, and though it gets on my nerves whenever she asks if Dad's around ( she always cooks when he's eating at home, she almost never does when he's not. I really think it's because she wants to show off her culinary skills. urgh!!! ), I try to gulp the irritation down. After all, she's my aunt. And she cooks for us now that Nana's gone and Mum's busy with work. And her curry is really nice. Now, if only she can stop treating my Dad like her personal hero. Oh please no let not the love triangle exist. Tolong tolong. * * * I just got home from dinner with the njchoir peeps, and I had a great time laughing like mad to the stories we shared about the fear of insects and embarrassing moments. I don't want to talk about the embarrasing moments (haha), but on the way home as I thought about the conversation I smiled to myself and realised I looked moronic doing that alone facing the window of the bus 171 so I controlled my muscles like crazy. Isn't it funny - we're at 0the top of the food chain, yet we are so so afraid of the insects that reign only at the bottom most of the hierarchy? Cockroaches, lizards, moths, spiders... the list goes on. I wonder how they feel, looking at us scream in horror and jumping around in disgust and fright when we look at them. They must be feeling the same fear, maybe mixed with some amusement because the size ratio is like 100000000 to 1, yet the reaction makes it seem like the ratio is reversed. If I could be an insect for a day, I'll like to be a cockroach so I can go around scaring people I don't really like. Is Ah Bo Jong afraid of cockroaches? Okay maybe not. I'd rather be a butterfly, because they can fly and they look more appealing. Thursday, January 18, 2007 @ 4:37 PM
the family affair After years of careful observation, I have come to realise that my family history may not be as simple as I think. In primary school I believed that one sunny day Dad met Mum, and tadaa they got married and we popped out. Now that a decade has passed I strongly believe that there are untold juicy details in between. Introducing my aunt, my mother's elder sister. Everyone calls her Ah Bo Jong ( in Hainanese 'Ah Bo' means aunt I think, because we call every aunt 'Ah Bo' something) - the forceful syllable 'Jong' kind of represents the way my sister and I see her. She isn't married, which according to my mum is something surprising, because when they were all brimming with youth, she was the most beautiful sister of them all. When mummy told me that I frowned in suspicion, but later I saw a picture mum and my aunts - and indeed, she was gorgeous. Big almond shaped eyes, a defined nose, small pouty lips, jet black hair. I couldn't really believe it, but pictures never lie. It's an entirely different story now, of course. Age kicks in, and the wrinkles grow like weeds. The thing about Ah Bo Jong is, she's a woman I find very hard to get along with. She complains about every single thing; my mum's cooking, the maid we just employed, her own hair. Her voice is shrilly, loud and when she laughs I worry for my eardrums. She complains about everyone's cooking and the Government and her life but somehow only she only talks and doesn't take action. Not to mention the fact that she condemned my faith the most - even more than my parents - some time ago. Don't get me wrong - I don't particularly dislike her. I just find her difficult to get along with. Alright maybe I dislike her a bit, but I'm trying very hard to embrace her goodness. She cooks nice curry, for example. But oddly, to my Dad, she seems an entirely different person. Her voice softens, she complains less, she smiles more. And this phenomenon has been ongoing for as long as I can remember. Isn't it suspicious? My sis and I believe that she's secretly in love with my Dad. She's been dropping by very very often these days now that Nana's gone ( Nana and her had a conflict over nail polish years and years ago and Nana cannot stand her - until now, she scoffs when I tell her over the phone that Ah Bo Jong comes over often! ), and the behavioural difference is so so obvious! I wonder why all the adults can't see it. Mum thought I was crazy when I mentioned the plausible love triangle. *shakes head* Adults are blind when it comes to these things. I can hear footsteps, I think she's coming. willcontinueanothertime! Wednesday, January 17, 2007 @ 10:54 PM
event/ (n) a thing that happens. This whole dictionary affair is driving me up the wall one time, and making me smile to myself the other. I now have a love-hate relationship with the Paperback Oxford English Dictionary (supposedly the world's most trusted dictionary somemore leh), because I cannot understand why the English Language must have so many words and even more meanings just for a single word. Yet the beauty of the language lies in these. The irony of the century. According to this dictionary, then, an event is a thing that happens. oooo. ahhhh. I think I'm too bored. But yes anyway the past week has been an eventful week filled with birthdays! First there was Chengluan, who turned eighteen last sunday. =)  This is Chengluan, fumbling around with something I don't know what.   Pizza Hut has nice mirrors for picture taking. You're looking at a photo of us looking at a mirror to take the photo that you are looking at now! And then there was Nani, who turned nineteen last monday!
Us creeping along the corridor to her house for the surprise. Dinie's in red holding the cake!
Haha Nani don't kill me for posting this pic!! I totally dig the expression on her face when she saw us through the door. =p
Dinie looks constipated. I miss a lot a people these days, as I type away in that sedentary job of mine. They know who they are. =) But working at home has its perks, I'd have to admit. The greatest perk is that I get to wake up whenever I want, so long as I finish what I have to finish - oh and I get to walk to the fridge often and jump around the house to music when I get bored. A cheap thrill's still a thrill! This is random and a little out of sense, but... I miss njc. The people, the place, the food. I feel nostalgic. Oh well. Another 24 pages for me tomorrow! Thursday, January 11, 2007 @ 11:29 PM
quiche, quill, quack 'Mavis, XiaoHui and I are in charge of a project initiated by an employer from a tuition centre. Our task is to create a book of vocabulary exercises that is useful and creative. So we have to brainstorm for ways to make it sell and ensure that it is not any boring assessment book that holds little value. Right now we are in the preliminary stage of classifying all the words in an established dictionary according to proficiency level, mark my words, all. It is no mean task and I can appreciate the diversity of the English language better and improve my lousy vocabulary. At the same time I want to tear my hair out over the fact that it is near impossible to categorize them, and I am only at the first letter A. After this we have to compile them into further categorises according to themes and then decide the number of pages and words and what not. Then we start on the real work - thinking of games and formats to present the exercises. After that it is drafting and hopefully we can find a willing publisher. ' (From Rhoda's blog.) I've started work, finally. Wouldn't call it the conventional kind, because I get to work at home and surprise, surprise - I get intellectually stimulated too. But at this initial stage I think my eyes are beginning to give way. Hours in front of the computer can get torturous if you are not doing something entirely entertaining. I have 299 pages of the dictionary to pore through, and now I am only at the 16th page. To think we ambitiously told our boss that we'll finish poring through the dictionary by next week! Nonetheless, I'll keep typing and dictating the words on the dictionary as I attempt to type faster and faster to the point where you can't see my hands because they're flying all over the keyboard. muahaha. Next word: quincunx/kwin-kungks/ (n) an arrangement of five objects with four at the corners of a square or a rectangle nad the fifth at its centre. I've absorbed so many weird words today, I think I've forgotten them all. Gah! Sunday, January 07, 2007 @ 11:00 PM
blogging I'm blogging about blogging! I started this blog close to three years ago, in May 2004. I didn't think much of it then; at that point in time I went with the flow - people were starting to move from open diary to blogspot, so copycat me did the same. Reading my past entries occasionally does conjure some strong feelings. I'm amazed at the change in my way of blogging; somehow now I'm more careful, more collected... perhaps it's instinct, that I'm becoming more private as I grow older? I don't know, you just tend to think more about what you type as the mind matures? It's a pity, I think, because my entries become less entertaining, albeit (I like to think) they are more insightful now. Whoever invented blogging, ought to be given a Nobel Prize. Honestly! If there were no blogs I think going online would hold much lesser meaning. It's just the whole process, from thinking about what you want to blog about to actually blogging to publishing - it makes me feel like I'm a journalist, which was actually one of my big-time ambition way back in the blue days. But more importantly, I think blogging has some sort of a cleansing effect, like catharsis when you watch a tragic play. It's hard to put it into words. When I see the entry published, a rush of... I don't know, shiokness? fills me. But this shiokness seems to be diminishing. Somehow the joy of blogging for me is disappearing these days, and I am contemplating the reasons why. Maybe it's the slacking. Because the brain slows down and you feel numb to certain things. Or the blog layout. It's too white. I need more purple. lkja;lkfj;akdjf;ajf. Maybe I ought to open up and just let the thoughts flow. No matter. I'll get it back, I'm sure! Class chalet the next three days! whee. =) Wednesday, January 03, 2007 @ 11:55 PM
rojak I think my language skills are slowly but surely deproving, along with the intellectual part of me which is deproving at an alarming rate as well. Aiya I shall not be too worried. It's time to be more brainless now that I've been brainful for the past ten years. I've been mulling over what to blog about these days, and I finally had an epiphany of sorts. I cut my hair! Okay I didn't, the hairdresser did. (old joke, I know...) And dyed it and highlighted it. I thought for ages before deciding on bangs, because I haven't had bangs since primary school. And in primary school there was the ez link photo, which is quite scary. What made me cut the bangs? An impulsive streak, perhaps. I went back to css recently too. The new campus generated a weird mix of feelings, that of indignation and pity and nostalgia and a tinge of sadness. It's awesome how a single building can mean so much to someone... yet the new campus still had a commonwealthian feel to it. I can't explain it, but when I stepped into it for the first time I still felt that tinge of homeliness, which was great. =) I've been slacking these days, going out and staying at home and alternating between these two activities gleefully. It's truly glorious. I love my life. My parents don't, though. They are bugging me to work, and I simply do not understand why when I have my entire lifetime to do so. I have a job interview tomorrow, anyway. Am I contradicting myself? Blah. I saw a rainbow a couple of days back! My entire family got quite excited and my sis and I jumped up and down by the window and pointed at it through the window grille. The rainbow looked odd though, juxtaposed against the structured, dull HDB flats lining the horizon. There's a reason why this entry is entitled 'rojak'. Tuesday, January 02, 2007 @ 11:12 PM
two thousand and seven! A long long time ago, there lived three young children. BEFORE The three young children are now three young adults. AFTER HOW SHOCKING!!!!!! LOOK AT HOW SHUAI AND PRETTY THEY ARE NOW!!! The change is so shocking that we went a bit ke siao. HAPPY TWO THOUSAND AND SEVEN! =D - with love from the three spastic besties above. Haha. Anyway my dear dear bestie angela's representing njc in an inter-jc pageant, so please vote for her at http://www.funkygrad.com/hollywoodglamour/poll.php right now! Your vote matters. Gosh that sounded so... political election-ish. Haha so yeah vote for her 'cos in my opinion she's the best! On a less enthusiastic note, my blog blood's not flowing these days. A longer entry sometime soon! |
